I took this photo from my trip to Amsterdam in September at the beautiful Amsterdam flower markets. However, what I didn’t take, what I wish I did take (or in this case buy) is a bouquet of fresh , real, earthy, vibrant flowers. Looking at this photo alone fills me with so much happiness! It reminds me of the lush scent of flowers, the memories I made on my trip and is honestly just aesthetically pleasing to look at. All these emotions come simply from a photo, imagine then, how overwhelmingly happy having bought those flowers could have made me. So why didn’t I buy them? Well its the same reason women often don’t buy themselves flowers. We see flowers as something that must be earned. Flowers are received for anniversaries, birthdays, Valentine’s Day and other markers of celebration or importance. I often feel that there must be some significance or justification to purchasing flowers. I find it silly to reflect on this notion and the way we all seem to uphold this idea that flowers are not just beautiful but that they must be tied to something of greater significance. How silly it is that I walk by flower stands at my local market and in town so frequently that stopping and smelling the roses has truly become a routine, while providing myself with the gratification of taking a bouquet home is still so taboo.
The gift giving nature of flowers is also a puzzling one. Flowers can make you happy, thats a fact. They are mood enhancers and make people feel great! It’s fascinating then that in society we often associate flowers as an object to be gifted or received. This says a lot about where people derive their happiness from and the fact that happiness is more and more becoming based on external factors beyond the individual. If I’m having a bad day and want to be cheered up, rather than taking charge of my own life to make things better I’m told to wait for someone else to make me happy, for another person to buy me flowers. This is clearly an unhealthy practice that is part of a much wider discussion than just flowers, but it is none the less interesting to think about.
Now most of this post has discussed why we should buy ourselves flowers and be responsible for our own happiness, but that's not to say that we can’t or shouldn’t give the gift of happiness (in this case flowers) to others. A few months back I was at a department store browsing the perfume section in the above daisy clad outfit when the sweetest sales associate approached me. The lady was a ray of sunshine and could not have been more upbeat and happy! She continually complimented my shorts and the daisy print, which filled me with tons of joy and just plastered a smile on my face. As I was getting ready to leave the shop the sales associate ran to the Daisy by Marc Jacobs display where they had a pot of real daisy’s and insisted I take it home as they were nearing the end of their life on the shelf. The woman’s actions are to this day something that bring a smile to my face, her kindness and simple gesture speaks volumes about how simply we can influence others lives. Giving the gift of flowers for no reason in particular, not to mark an occasion or celebrate anything grandiose, can prove to be a gesture filled with love and kindness. I implore you, whether or not you have a romantic partner to buy someone in your life, maybe a best friend, family member, or even stranger a bouquet of flowers for no reason in particular and watch as that person is filled with joy!
I’d like to propose that we stick up a united middle finger to the conventions of flower shopping, and the next time any of us sees a bouquet that grasps our attention we buy it for the simple reason that is “they made you happy” or “it will make someone else happy”.
All Photos Are My Own.
XXX
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